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Why 'Star Wars' Has NOT Been Ruined!

Grow. The. F%&k. Up.

By Jonathan SimPublished 6 years ago 10 min read
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Recently, I wrote a satirical article called "Complaining About 'Return of the Jedi' the Way People Complain About 'The Last Jedi'", and the point of that article was to joke about how if Return of the Jedi was released to the SW fans of 2018, they would be complaining about it the same way they complain about The Last Jedi.

But at this point, I am honestly sick of seeing all these complaints about The Last Jedi. I mean, first off, how can you be so torn up about a MOVIE that you're STILL complaining about it, even three months after its release?

And second, how is complaining about a movie gonna change anything about the movie? I mean, I didn't love Die Hard 5, but I don't complain about it obsessively, because even if I did, I can't change the movie.

Now, I liked The Last Jedi, but there were some obvious flaws about the movie. So, I'm gonna take some of the most common complaints about the film and give my opinion on it. And I'll explain why this flaw doesn't ruin the movie.

Forced Comedy

Star Wars doesn't really have a real brand of comedy. In the films, there are a couple of heh-heh moments, but there's nothing hilarious. But in this film, I guess people don't think the comedy felt very Star Wars. The jokes in the movie just seemed out of place.

Now, I don't even get this complaint. There were a few jokes in this movie, but they weren't HILARIOUS, because Star Wars isn't supposed to be hilarious. So, what the f**k you complaining about?

Rey is too much of a Mary Sue.

I hear this a lot; people complaining about how Rey is supposedly good at everything, and she doesn't need any training at all to be good with the Force. And sometimes, I've agreed. She does kind of seem like a Mary Sue, but her skills make sense.

First off, Rey is Force-sensitive. She has midi-chlorians in her cells, and that's why Anakin's lightsaber calls out to her, and that's why she's so good with the Force.

Now, if you think about it, she's not very different from Luke. If you think about it, Obi-Wan never really TRAINED Luke. Within hours of deciding to become a Jedi, Luke was able to use the Force to accurately hit lasers from a ball.

And in just another day or so, Luke was able to use the Force to hit TIE fighters in the Death Star, and he was then able to blow up the Death Star with a one-in-a-million shot. So, is Luke a Mary Sue? Because he sure as hell is. But you're not gonna hear anyone complaining about Luke's miraculous Force abilities.

Rey can fight with a lightsaber because the Force assists her, and she knows how to defend herself. Remember when she singlehandedly beat off all of Unkar Plutt's thugs?

She is a skilled pilot because she was left on a shady planet like Jakku with no loving guardian, and as a result, she learned how to pilot a ship, and she knows how to protect herself. This isn't rocket science.

And if you watch her fight scene with Kylo Ren in The Last Jedi, you can see that Rey is just barely able to fight the guards, and that Kylo is actually much more skilled than her. So what now? Kylo Ren is also a Mary Sue.

You also don't need Jedi training to fight with a lightsaber. Again, she simply knows self-defense and the Force assists her. And if you're wondering why the Force and the lightsaber would call out to Rey, a nobody, then–

*COUGH**COUGH*Anakin*COUGH**COUGH* Sorry, I had something caught in my throat there called logic.

Luke Skywalker's character was ruined.

I already talked about this in another article I wrote called "In Defense of Luke Skywalker in 'Star Wars: The Last Jedi'". If you don't want to open that up in a new tab, I'll give a summary, but I'd recommend reading the other article.

So, first off, the lightsaber toss.

What else would you expect Luke to do? I mean, his character was changed; he has abandoned the Jedi order and the Force, and he has exiled himself on Ahch-To, so the last thing Luke would realistically want is to take a lightsaber that reminds him of his past.

It was unexpected, but it made sense for his character. And besides, if you look at Luke's face at the end of The Force Awakens when Rey holds out the lightsaber, Luke looks pretty pissed. He doesn't look like he'd ignite the saber and say "Let's go."

Also, Luke never tried to kill Kylo Ren. He stood over him and for a brief second, he saw who he would grow up to be, and for a brief second, Luke thought that he could stop him before he create the damage he was destined to create.

So, he ignited his lightsaber, but immediately felt nothing but regret and shame. Luke was about to leave Ben, but it was too late, and the next thing he knew, Ben had burned down the Jedi temple and killed his students.

I have to ask you this—if you could kill baby Hitler, would you? Because that's why Luke ignited his lightsaber. But Luke was too good to do it. He realized that it wasn't right.

And if you're saying that Luke would NEVER stand over his nephew with a lightsaber, may I remind you of what Luke did to his own father.

So, yeah. Vader threatens to turn Leia to the Dark Side and Luke cuts off his hand? Perfectly fine! Luke sees visions of Ben killing his students and becoming the Supreme Leader of the First Order, so Luke stands over him with a saber?

HORRIBLE! FRIGHTENING! TERRIBLE! DISGUSTING!

Luke has lost faith in the Jedi order, but then, Rey arrives and makes it clear to him how much the Resistance needs him. Yoda's Force-ghost arrives and gives Luke some words of advice. So, Luke sends his Force projection to face Kylo and the First Order.

The reason Luke doesn't go himself is because he wanted to distract the First Order long enough for the Resistance to escape. If Luke had shown up himself, he likely wouldn't have been able to ward off the First Order long enough.

And when Kylo and Luke face off, Luke never touches lightsabers with Kylo. Why? Because he knows better. He won't harm Kylo any more than he already has.

But Luke tells him this: "The Rebellion is reborn today. The war is just beginning. And I will not be the last Jedi." Luke has changed from the start of the movie. He now believes he won't be the last Jedi, and has faith that the new Resistance will bring the First Order down. He reveals himself as a Force-projection and vanishes.

On Ahch-To, the strain on Luke's body from projecting himself across the galaxy takes its toll. And as a result, he becomes one with the Force, having sacrificed his life to save his sister and the Resistance.

Luke wasn't ruined. And besides, this was the best way for Luke to die. Victorious and triumphant, and at peace. If Luke was tragically killed by Kylo Ren or the First Order, it would have been too similar to Han's death.

Canto Bight was too boring!

Alright, I'll admit—Finn and Rose's storyline wasn't extremely interesting. But it made sense for what was happening in the movie. Because Rey was with Luke on Ahch-To, Poe was staging a mutiny that Finn characteristically wouldn't take part in, and Finn needed his own adventure.

Finn had to be with someone in his storyline in order for there to be dialogue, so he was paired with a new character, Rose. And they had their storyline with DJ and his betrayal. So, Canto Bight could have been done better, I'll admit it. But it was necessary.

The Last Jedi didn't introduce new worlds.

But–but Canto Bight–that's... that's a new–you know what? It doesn't matter at this point.

Snoke's Death was random and unnecessary./ We got no backstory.

Snoke died in this movie because Kylo Ren is supposed to be the main villain of this trilogy. And the death made sense; Kylo killed off Snoke so that he could take over as Supreme Leader of the First Order.

If Snoke had lived to Episode IX, then Episode IX would be the most predictable Star Wars movie ever. Snoke tortures Rey, but Kylo becomes upset and kills Snoke, and Rey and Kylo kiss. #ReyloForever

But here's the thing: you wanted a movie in which Luke lived and Snoke lived? Because if they lived in this movie, The Last Jedi would have literally served no purpose in the trilogy.

Important events like the deaths of Snoke and Luke had to happen in order for Episode 8 to serve a purpose in the trilogy. Otherwise, everything important would only happen in Episodes 7 and 9.

Also, Snoke died with no backstory? You people act like in Episode IX, Kylo can't just briefly talk about Snoke's backstory for fifteen seconds. Just because Snoke is dead doesn't mean Kylo can't disclose Snoke's backstory.

And where would Snoke's backstory even fit into the plot? This movie followed Rey, Kylo, Luke, Finn, Rose, Poe, Holdo, and Phasma. I personally felt like if Snoke's backstory was randomly put in some scene in the film, it would be distracting from the important events.

Holdo and Rose were bad, poorly developed characters.

I will not disagree with you here. I believed Rose and Holdo were poorly written, but I don't think that Rose was quite as bad as everyone says she is.

Yeah, the point is, these characters could have been developed a lot better and made a lot more likeable. These two were some of the largest flaws in the film. But I don't think that TWO characters ruined the entirety of Star Wars.

Leia flying through space was stupid.

Well, the scene made sense. Leia used the Force to save her life. It just looked ridiculous, and again, it's not that bad of a scene. I admit, I, too, was thinking "WTF?" when I saw this, because I thought that the lack of gravity just ex-machinaed her out of death.

But it was the Force. And it made sense.

The Last Jedi only exists to fuel an SJW feminism rhetoric.

Shut up. That's literally so stupid.

Rey is a powerful female, but as we established before, there are good reasons for why she has those powers, and her skills all make sense.

Yes, Rose and Holdo were some unappealing female characters, but they wouldn't have been good characters regardless of whether they were male or female. Their being female doesn't make the characters worse.

And given the fact that in the original trilogy, Princess Leia was virtually the only important female character, it makes sense for them to want them to update it a little bit.

But stop saying that just because a movie had some female characters you didn't like, the movie just hates men and that females are ruining Star Wars. It fills the world with negativity that the world just doesn't need.

WOW! That was a long article. I mean, are you still here? If you're still here, I love you.

The point in this article wasn't to hate on people who didn't like The Last Jedi. What I'm saying is we should let people like the film, let people hate the film, and if you didn't like it, I hope this article has given you a more positive outlook.

If your hatred for the movie still hasn't changed, then please don't comment on every single Star Wars post about how bad it was. It just spreads hate and negativity. Darth Sidious is probably watching you all like–

Did The Last Jedi have flaws? Yes. But I don't think that the complaints made by SW fans are enough to label the movie as horrible.

I mean, people complaining that SW is ruined because of the movie? You mean, a franchise of ten films, two TV shows, and thousands of books and media has been RUINED by ONE movie? If that's what you think, I'm sorry, but you're just not a real SW fan.

Alright. That's it.

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About the Creator

Jonathan Sim

Film critic. Lover of Pixar, Harry Potter, Star Wars, Marvel, DC, Back to the Future, and Lord of the Rings.

For business inquiries: [email protected]

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